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The F-Word and Hmong Men
Ah, the dreaded “F” word, it’s so triggering. There are some who can’t see the “F” word without going into spasms of word vomit about angry Hmong women blaming everything wrong in the world on Hmong men. There’s always the slew of comments about “not all Hmong men” and “women are at fault too.” Then there is the bevy of comments about how women just want to brow-beat men and how toxic feminism is.
Well, let’s break some things down to basics. Feminism isn’t about overpowering men. Feminism, by definition, is the fight for equality between both men and women. It actually advocates for fair treatment of men too, and patriarchy is actually not the opposite of feminism. Matriarchy is. The definitions of matriarchy and patriarchy are the literal social rule of and by one sex over the other.
Feminism fights for men’s liberation as much as it fights for women’s. It advocates to defy social gender constructs of what is “feminine” and “masculine.” It says yes, men can be stay-at-home dads and there should be no embarrassment in doing so. It says yes, men can love the feminine aspects of themselves without shame. It unchains men from the bounds of masculine expectation that you must be strong all the time, that you are not allowed to emote, that you can’t break down.